From Surviving to Thriving: Lessons from Shonda Rhimes, Kari Leibowitz, and Seth Godin
Welcome to my quarter one professional development book haul!
I love to read. I read all the time: first thing in the morning, before bed, in those few minutes before an appointment, while I’m waiting to leave and have a few minutes to spare. In 2025, I have this idea to read a book each month specifically related to personal or professional development and to share about them along the way. Not all of us have time or money for a workshop, mastermind, or career coach. Even though that may be the dream one day, in the meantime, there is so much that you can learn from reading books. And there is literally a book out there for any topic you are curious about. AND if you are really trying not to break the bank, you can check out a physical book or an audiobook out from your local library (I am a library girl and hardly ever actually purchase a book.)
My word for 2025 is courage and I have a lot of goals on my list this year that are going to require me to step outside of my comfort zone. On a personal level, I want to meet new people, to show up, and to be a bit vulnerable. On a professional level, I want to build a business. I recognize that I am in a season of hustling. I want to make money in 2025. I want to build sustainable systems so that I am using my time effectively and still have the time to travel, focus on fitness goals, and enjoy life. I want to be busy, but in the right ways.
Can you relate?
As a result, the books I am adding to my reading list are to help me improve in these areas, with an odd recommendation from a friend thrown in here and there. Topic wise, my quarter one picks were a bit all over the map, but in this issue we are going to cover:
Year of Yes: How to Dance it Out, Stand in the Sun, and Be Your Own Person by Shonda Rhimes;
How to Winter: Harness Your Mindset to Thrive on Cold, Dark, or Difficult Days by Kari Leibowitz;
This is Marketing: You Can’t be Seen Until You Learn to See by Seth Godin.
Let’s dive in!
Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes
It was probably a sign from the universe that the first book that came in from the library to start my year of books was Year of Yes: How to Dance it Out, Stand in the Sun, and Be Your Own Person by Shonda Rhimes. This is an older book from 2015, but each chapter was just the nudge I needed as I started out the year. The irony was also not lost on me that this book showed up the day before I’m supposed to go to the kickoff party for the cycling group that I actually joined last year and never managed to attend a bike ride with. I’ve told myself I’m going to try again this year to be involved with this cycling group, but I was already thinking up excuses for why I didn’t have to go, all of which are pretty lame if I do say so myself.
Just having this book in my hands was the nudge I needed to get my butt off the couch and head to that evening's event. I even managed to talk to a handful of new people. The overall premise of the book is to say yes to things, especially the things that scare you. I’m not interested in saying yes to everything, but I want to say yes more. Sometimes the yes is obvious. Like, yes, I obviously should say yes to going to the kick-off party even though there will be new people and that sounds about as fun as going to the dentist. That was a good yes, and I’m glad that I got over myself and did it. Sometimes how we limit ourselves isn’t as straightforward though. I really related to the chapter that was about how women have a hard time accepting compliments. I feel like I am usually pretty good at accepting compliments, but then I found myself in a meeting at my day job only kind of accepting praise for summer camp registration going off without a hitch and being 50% sold out by the end of the day. Sure I had support, but I’m the one who worked my booty off so that there would not be any issues. I’m the one that parents trust. Me, myself, I. I should have used Rhimes’s advice of - thank you, smile, shut up. I also loved her chapter about finding and recognizing your people, and getting rid of the people that do not meet your standards.
Favorite Quotes:
“They tell you: Follow your dreams. Listen to your spirit. Change the world. Make your mark. Find your inner voice and make it sing. Embrace failure. Dream. Dream and dream big. As a matter of fact, dream and don’t stop dreaming until your dream comes true. I think that’s crap. I think a lot of people dream. And while they are busy dreaming, the really happy people, the really successful people, the really interesting, powerful, engaged people? Are busy doing. The dreamers. They stare at the sky and they make plans and they home and they think and they talk about it endlessly. And they start a lot of sentences with ‘I want to be…’ and they dream of it. The buttoned-up ones meet for cocktails and they all brag about their dreams. The hippie ones have vision boards and they meditate on their dreams… Dreams are lovely. But they are just dreams, fleeting, ephemeral. Pretty. But dreams do not come true just because you dream them. It’s hard work that makes things happen. It’s hard work that creates change.”
“As the weeks roll by, this part - thank you, smile, shut up - gets easier. It takes some practice but I slowly start to get better at it. Thank you, smile, shut up. And what happens is, when I give myself permission to just hear the compliments and not apologize for the compliments or brush them off or negate the compliments? I start to appreciate the compliments. The compliments mean something to me. More important? The fact that someone paused to take time to give me a compliment means something to me. No one is obligated to compliment you. They do it out of kindness. They do it because they want to. They do it because they believe the compliment they are offering. So when you negate someone’s complement, you are telling them they are wrong. You're telling them they wasted their time. You are questioning their taste and their judgement. You are insulting them.”
“Yes to real people. Yes to true friends. Yes to not needing to lay a single piece of track. Ride or Die. Every single time. Ride or die…. ‘Don’t let what he wants eclipse what you need. He is very dreamy,” she (Christina from Gray’s Anatomy) says. ‘But he is not the sun. You are.’ Her final piece of advice is not just for the women of America, I am now realizing, but also for me.”
How to Winter by Kari Leibowitz
What’s your favorite season? Summer and fall are probably my favorite. I want all of the sun and all of the colors. As soon as daylight savings time ends, here are phrases that you will hear come out of my mouth:
I hate it when the clocks change.
I hate getting up when it is dark and leaving work when it is dark.
And when when winter really hits, it’s:
It’s so dreary outside.
It’s too cold to do anything today.
How to Winter: Harness Your Mindset to Thrive on Cold, Dark, or Difficult Days by Kari Leibowitz was the perfect book for February and I read it on recommendation of a friend. This friend also loves winter a lot more than I do, like camps in the snow loves winter. No thank you. Even though the days are slowly starting to get longer, things are still quite wintery here in Colorado. (Though let’s be real, it could still snow in May where I live in Colorado.) Winter has always been a hard time of year for me. I crave the sun and daylight and my mood drastically shifts if the sun is not out. After living in Colorado for so long, where it is sunny 300+ days out of the year, the cloudy days feel even more pronounced. In the book, Leibowitz takes a look at societies where winter is inescapable, namely countries like Norway and Finland. She identified how these cultures have an ingrained positive winter mindset and that even those that live in literally the darkest places on the planet for long stretches of time look forward to and embrace everything that is only possible during the winter time. The book is organized around three key themes:
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Appreciate Winter
Make it Special
Get Outside
Appreciate Winter
These chapters have to do with accepting winter for what it is: a time for resting and slowing down. Our natural world is taking a chill pill and usually our bodies want to do the same, so we should stop trying to act like we can be operating at 100% all year round. Oof. This can be hard. So much of our society is built around hustle, business, and continuous striving. And I’m in the middle of it. I’m working full time, trying to build a business on the side, while also trying to exercise, eat healthy, get enough sleep, drink my water, the list goes on. It can be hard to take time to rest without feeling guilty about it. (Anybody else 🙋♀️?) Accepting winter also means taking the time to notice what makes winter special rather than difficult. For example, one thing I love about winter is the angle of the light and how the lack of leaves on the trees reveals more of landscape. I also love how the creek where I work is constantly freezing and unfreezing.
Make It Special
This is the section that I felt the most drawn to. I’m not sure I do anything to make winter special. I get excited for the holidays, especially decorating and putting up lights, but life and work feel so hectic around that time of year, that by the time I am ready to relax and enjoy the lights, it feels like it is time to take them down. And sometimes there is nothing worse than putting all of your decorations away and noticing how plain and devoid of colors things now look. In the book, Leibowitz suggests you come up with some practices and rituals that will make you look forward to winter. She suggests things like adding pillows and blankets, using candles and adjusting your light, starting rituals that you only do in winter like a hot bath or hot cocoa on the couch. I know that when daylight savings ends in November is always a depressing moment for me mentally, so I’ve added it to my calendar to intentionally make my winter cozier for next year and to keep that coziness through the holiday season to the start of spring.
Get Outside
Obvious perhaps, but most of us have heard the phrase there is no such thing as bad weather, but bad clothes. Moving to Colorado has certainly impacted my opinion on this one. Before moving here, I would never have thought that I would be hiking up mountains in the snow or riding my bike in 30 degree weather. But it is true, the conditions are usually not as bad as you think they will be and you always feel better after spending time outside. My favorite aspects about outdoor winter activities are the light, how trails and bike paths are less busy (you can sleep in AND still find parking at a trailhead), and how easy it is to see wildlife in winter. I get my best pictures of eagles and hawks during the winter months. Ways I’ve tried to be more intentional about my outdoor time is trying to go on more lunch walks, especially during the work week, even on the coldest days this winter.
At the end of each chapter she even has a list of winter practices to try. Here are some my favorites:
Plan a daylight savings celebration. Next year I plan to designate a set of my Christmas lights to be winter lights and they are going to go up as soon as I’m forced to change our clocks to make our home a bit cozier.
Explore slow hobbies. I am enjoying my new(ish) cross stitch so much that I cannot believe that I went so long without having one to work on. It is the perfect slow hobby to work on in the winter cozied up on the couch. I know that progress is going to slow down on it during the summer, and I think that is going to be a good thing. I’ll look forward to coming back to it once the light changes and the temperature drops.
Question your negative thoughts. I have already started noticing when I have negative thoughts about the weather or when I hear others voicing negative thoughts. It really is amazing how your mindset changes when you start to notice those things.
Light it up and find a way to add more fire into your life. I love candles and fire, but I hardly ever light them. I think I will get some more unscented candles for winter coziness.
Reclaim a summer love. Even though I (almost) always enjoy it, it always takes a bit more motivation to ride my bike in the winter. It requires more planning, usually putting my bike in my car, more clothes, etc., but even a short chilly ride can feel so good. Winter bike rides are slower, more relaxed, and about noticing nature and the way the landscape changes. You just have to watch out for the ice!
Find a sauna. I’m not sure I have ever used a sauna, but I want to.
This is Marketing by Seth Godin
This is Marketing is my first book by Seth Godin. Among many of entrepreneurs I follow and learn from (Bonnie Christine, Marie Forleo, Amy Porterfield), he is often lauded as a marketing genius and as somebody who breaks down complex topics, like marketing, into its most basic principals. Godin came back on my radar recently because his newest book, This is Strategy, came out in fall 2024, and he was making the rounds on many of my podcasts. Instead of picking up one of his newest books, I decided to go with one that people refer to as an oldie but a goodie: This is Marketing, which is actually from way back in 2018.
The book itself is small and compact and what I liked about it the most was its emphasis on serving your audience and telling stories no matter how small or niche that audience may be. In 2025, I am making a more concerted effort to talk about what I have for sale, like my original paintings in my Etsy shop and my designs that are on Spoonflower. This is still important, since how will anybody know to buy something if you do not talk about it? But, this book provided a good reminder to make sure that you are always providing value to your audience and recognizing that this takes time and consistent effort. You want to take the time to get to know your people and for them to get to know you. You could talk to somebody for years before they trust you enough to purchase something for you. This book really reinforced that I need to spend a lot of time building trust with my audience, showing up regularly through things like my blog and newsletter, providing proof of concept, giving them a reason to be interested in following along before there is anything even to offer them. He also encouraged readers to build the plane while you are flying it. Most business is personal, so let people see who you are, and how you are evolving in real time. Harder than it sounds of course, especially for this introvert, but good advice nevertheless.
Godin’s emphasis on storytelling was also really interesting, specifically making sure that your audience is always the focus of that storytelling. Figuring out how my audience fits into my story is something that I still need to work on. I tend to speak a lot about how things impact me or what experiences I am having, but I need to spend more time thinking about how what I am learning and doing can help other people, but not in a sales way. More than finding customers, I’m also interested in building a community of people who are interested in the same things that I am interested in and who are interested in growing in the same ways.
Favorite Quotes
“Time to get off the social media merry-go-round that goes faster and faster but never gets anywhere…Time to stop looking for shortcuts, and time to start insisting on a long, viable path instead.”
“The goal isn’t to personalize the work. It’s to make it personal.”
“You can ask, ‘What change do I seek to make?’ Once you know what you stand for, the rest gets a lot easier.”
“That story isn’t for everyone, but for the right people, it will transform the experience. Who’s it for, what’s it for, and how is status changed? What will I tell the others?”
Looking Forward to Quarter Two
As this blog hits the inter webs, spring has officially started and we are about to say goodbye to quarter one and hello to quarter two. With the start of April, my busy season kicks up a notch as all three of my major (day job) work projects start to overlap and I get ready for insanity that is summer camp starting in June, I try to figure out how I am going to stay consistent in my art-work as things get busier, and my cycling training for my summer race really starts to accelerate. Have any recommendations for how to stay sane during this next quarter?